An excellent way to get to know someone is by asking their favorite books. These treasured stories and poems can give you insight into their influences, beliefs, preferences, and hopes. Even better, there’s a good chance you haven’t read the same books, so you get excellent recommendations for future reading. And if the other person doesn’t have any favorite books, don’t be their friend.
Here are mine. Except for #1, this Top 5 is subject to change based on my mood and whatever books I remember later. But this is a good list.
Gone to Soldiers by Marge Piercy
Like Game of Thrones, Gone to Soldiers is an epic novel following multiple POV characters over many years, but in this story, the world torn apart by war is ours and the war is World War II. A thrilling and heartbreaking view of wartime through the eyes of outsiders. Jewish characters fight with the French Resistance while others face antisemitism on the homefront and in the military. Women join the workforce, support the war effort, and take up arms, facing sexism, danger, and literal warfare. An astounding novel. It shocks me that it’s not more widely known.
I’m Not Stiller by Max Frisch
An American travelling through post-war Europe is arrested in Switzerland and accused of being Anatol Stiller, a missing Swiss sculptor. The American consistently denies this accusation, despite being identified as Stiller by his wife and multiple friends and acquaintances. Beyond the mystery of whether or not the American is Stiller, the novel examines the nature of identity and the extent to which a person must accept who they are and how far they can reinvent themselves.
I have a Feeling We’re Not in Kansas Anymore by Ethan Mordden
The first volume in a series of five collections of connected short stories, Kansas introduces a small group of friends in 1980s Manhattan – Bud, the narrator; Dennis Savage, his best friend; Little Kiwi, the naïve twink who steals Dennis’ heart; and other long- and short-term friends and acquaintances who make up their social circle. Funny, sentimental, and heartbreaking, the stories examine romantic love and chosen family against the backdrop of the still-early gay rights movement.
Family Dancing by David Leavitt
Another short story collection, also on gay themes. Leavitt explores his characters’ lives through their family relationships and connections, eschewing the gay urban ghettoes for suburbia and examining all the ways we are outsiders among our own.
Amerika by Franz Kafka
One of Kafka’s famously unfinished works, Amerika follows the adventures of 16-year old Karl Rossmann, who is forced by a sex scandal to leave Europe for America. On his travels, Karl befriends dubious allies, is adopted then abandoned by his uncle, and takes up with two layabouts to whom he is inconceivably loyal. Karl’s good nature is repeatedly betrayed by those who claim to be his friends, he is punished for breaking rules he does not know exist, and he misinterprets people and events with astonishing naivete, yet through it all, he maintains his optimism and generosity, as well as his hardheaded self-confidence. If you’ve ever found life cruel, random, and confusing as hell, you may find a kindred spirit in Karl.